Philosopher Fred Rauscher (Michigan State) "won the Internet" yesterday with his contribution to the thread on "abridged classics." His contribution deserves separate posting:
Heraclitus, Fragments:
Man unwittingly makes same point twicePlato, Meno:
Geometry lesson somehow requires ghostly realmPlato, Republic:
Conversation, conversation, spelunking, more conversationAristotle, Nicomachean Ethics:
Philosopher asks which life is best, answers “mine”Augustine, Confessions:
Man has fun, finds God, becomes bore
Aquinas, Summa Theologica:
User’s guide to world, with Frequently Asked QuestionsMachiavelli, The Prince:
Advice to rulers: do what you have always been doing anywayMontaigne, Essays:
Extremely wealthy man claims life’s not all badDescartes, Meditations:
After six days of effort, man right back where he startedLocke, Two Treatises on Government:
1: Who made him king anyway? 2: we can fire himLeibniz, postscript to any letter:
Here’s a sketch of some ideas I might work out in detail some dayHume, Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding:
Long argument to urge docile readers to organize mass book burningKant, Critique of Pure Reason:
Reason accuses self, defends self, judges self, acquits selfKant, Groundwork for the Metaphysics of Morals:
Man works out idea “what if everyone thought about ethics the way I do?”Hegel, Phenomenology of Spirit:
Man tries to know world, finds world itself beat him to itNietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil:
Philosopher unironically claims that all philosophers are hypocritical bastardsFrege, Foundations of Arithmetic:
Logician takes half of book to reach step OneWittgenstein, Tractatus:
After throwing away ladder he climbed, man realizes he cannot ask for helpLewis, On the Plurality of Worlds:
Man in actual world presents argument similar to one by man in possible worldLeiter, Why Tolerate Religion:
To be fair we should tolerate their stupid fantasy tales
You can add your own at yesterday's thread, as well as see other amusing contributions.
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